Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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