help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
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Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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