i need an iv and a liver transplant
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
