Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
