I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
