You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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