there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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