So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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