actually, I'm a sock model
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
