Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk

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  (312): I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk http://tfl.nu/cjl6
  Replies (8) Good night (1535) Bad night (582)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day

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  (440): Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day http://tfl.nu/1jo6
  Replies (74) Good night (3780) Bad night (933)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.

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  (609): I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish. http://tfl.nu/0wzx
  Replies (46) Good night (6340) Bad night (949)
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  (650): View more from California

  last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'

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  (650): last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.' http://tfl.nu/3iza
  Replies (16) Good night (5553) Bad night (1313)
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  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave

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  (339): When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave http://tfl.nu/n4gt
  Replies (9) Good night (963) Bad night (5746)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.

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  (802): Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator. http://tfl.nu/tdtw
  Replies (18) Good night (4724) Bad night (1414)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.

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  (604): Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge. http://tfl.nu/yomn
  Replies (10) Good night (1826) Bad night (2324)
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  (805): View more from California

  Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla

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  (805): Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla http://tfl.nu/wlr8
  Replies (9) Good night (2148) Bad night (950)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30

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  (845): I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30 http://tfl.nu/ce0m
  Replies (1) Good night (932) Bad night (514)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.

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  (860): Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers. http://tfl.nu/ep00
  Replies (7) Good night (456) Bad night (1017)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire

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  (404): Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire http://tfl.nu/4cfz
  Replies (3) Good night (390) Bad night (493)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice

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  (440): its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice http://tfl.nu/6xmq
  Replies (0) Good night (588) Bad night (358)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.

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  (740): I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college. http://tfl.nu/6kt7
  Replies (3) Good night (328) Bad night (581)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.

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  (804): The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it. http://tfl.nu/wu4y
  Replies (1) Good night (371) Bad night (453)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?

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  (740): I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin? http://tfl.nu/l0iy
  Replies (3) Good night (899) Bad night (292)

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