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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.

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• (510): View more from California

  It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...

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• (883): View more from

  I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet

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• (714): View more from California

  there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.

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• (323): View more from California

  Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?

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• (509): View more from Washington

  As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.

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• (315): View more from New York

  I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?

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