you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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