I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
