Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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