Where is the hickey?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You ate ashes out of my bong
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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