Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
