Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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