Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Randomize
