Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
