I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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