I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
ugly people sure do ruin things
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
