with your own penis?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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