I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
