My brain says no but my pants say off.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize