is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
It's no shave November. This is our time.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
