i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
