Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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