I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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