If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
