It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
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