sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
