Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize