There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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