oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
