do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
