His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
