I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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