Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
