You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
It's official drugs can't kill me
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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