I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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