with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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