I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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