Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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