His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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