i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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