im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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