i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
