boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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