No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize