Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
