im about as happy as oj after his trial
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
