today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
