HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
